How to attract love, sex, and husbands into your life? Svetlana Kolchik and psychologist Larisa Renar offer ways to get all of this and happiness to boot.
Both a woman and a man are in each of us – the focus is only on how they interact with each other and how balanced they are. Carl Gustav Jung said that in every woman lives an “animus” (Latin – “spirit”), responsible for her thoughts and beliefs, that is, for the rational link, and in every man there is an “anima” (“soul”) that controls his feelings. And since we all unconsciously strive to make up for what we lack in life, all our men resonate with our “animus” in one way or another. “It is easier for a man to desire the woman who most closely corresponds to the special type of his unconscious femininity, that is, a woman who could, if possible, unconditionally accept the projection of his soul,” wrote Jung. The more male energy we have (and the most harmonious combination for a woman is considered to be 20-25% male energy and 75-80% female), the more feminine men (indecisive, dependent, suspicious, overly sensitive, emotionally unstable – that is, with a strongly expressed feminine principle) we will attract. It turns out that the more developed the woman in us, the greater the chances of attracting a truly strong man. I call such men “resourceful” – they are not necessarily millionaires and not necessarily “status”, but they have a powerful potential for development and growth.
Tune in the woman in you, and the men you already have will start behaving better.
Larisa Renar, founder of the Academy of Private Life:
Male energy is the energy of struggle and achievement, and female energy is the energy of peace and pleasure. Acting on the principle of “I am myself” is a man’s way, letting a man take care of you is a woman’s way. Male energy helps to focus, achieve results. But if there is too much of it, a girl becomes tough, controlling, and demanding. She begins to compete with men, measuring will and strength with them. But this struggle leads to nothing. A woman with an imbalance of male energy suppresses, a man loses his strength next to her, becomes weak, and dependent. And the woman herself begins to get tired, get sick, and suffer from loneliness. Having taken on all the responsibility, at some point,t she feels empty and tired, squeezed out and cold. Sexual energy is female energy. It is the energy of creativity and passion; it sets the world in motion, forcing it to develop and change. That is why a man strives so much to merge with a woman, he wants to fill himself with this energy and realize his potential, creating something material. It could be a movie or a song, a factory or a restaurant, a car or a house – male energy always manifests itself in some form into which female energy is transformed.
It is quite possible to change the balance of male and female energies in yourself, with the help of practices and meditations, by changing your style of clothing (skirts and dresses enhance female energy, and trousers block it), as well as your lifestyle. Everything that brings joy fills a woman. Therefore, it is important to allocate two hours a day for emotions and two hours for pleasure. Melodrama, dinner with friends, a concert or exhibition, massage, a delicious dinner, creativity help us fill up with energy. And this is exactly what men expect from us – emotions and pleasure. It is also very important to see your own “inner” woman and man and realize how they manifest themselves in the outside world. Some of us have more passion, some are initially more tender, and some have a stronger desire to control and make decisions. Innate qualities are sometimes greatly corrected by upbringing. For example, a five-year-old girl is sure that if she asks a man for something, she will get it. And she easily asks her dad to give her a doll, and a stranger to buy her ice cream. She is happy with the gifts, and men are happy with her emotions.
But if mom thinks that it is impolite to ask, and if a man is ready to give something, it means that he wants something from you, and it is safer not to accept, then the innate property of a woman – the ability to accept gifts and return emotions – is blocked, and at some point she discovers that no one gives her anything. In Russia, upbringing has always been aimed at developing masculine qualities in a woman – purposefulness, will.
But it is mom who teaches us femininity through unconditional and joyful love for her daughter, jubilation, and pride that a girl was born. You just need to tell your daughter: “What a joy that you are a girl, there is so much joy, love, and opportunities in this!” And give her the right to pleasure, not scolding her for exploring herself, but encouraging and telling her. If a mother herself enjoys being a woman, respecting and recognizing men, allowing them to act like men, then her daughter will grow up to be a real woman. But if she considers men worthless, then she will make her daughter a worse copy of a man who sacrifices himself for the sake of his family and career.
Men, like a mirror, show a woman what is going on inside her. If she is not sure of her irresistibility, they compare her with others. If she is afraid of losing her, they cheat on her. If she has a strong will, there is a weak, weak person next to her. If a woman inside her fights with a man, then in reality she will also fight with men. We do not get what we want, but what energy we transmit. For example, we want a man to make decisions and help, but our inner woman does not trust a man, then in reality, the man does not even try to help. Or we complain that we are unwanted, but in our inner woman, sexuality is blocked, and external men do not show sexual interest. And so on ad infinitum. We need to change inside, remove fears, resentments, and everything that hinders us, and then the relationship with men will change immediately. Those that are already there will begin to behave differently, or others will appear that better meet our expectations.
How to Raise Feminine Energy
Meet with close female friends more often – communication with women who accept and love you increases feminine energy. Plus, it is an outlet for emotions that are better not to splash out on a man.
If you decide to see a psychologist, let it be a woman much older than you. It is also useful to communicate with grandmothers and great-grandmothers, and also, if you are not married but want to, with married friends. This will help “accumulate” the missing energy and attract marriage into your life.
- Ask men for help more often.
- Get regular massages or take up dancing and yoga – only with a female teacher, preferably married.
- Don’t swear – it’s a manifestation of male energy.
- Feed someone more often – your man, friends, animals – this also raises energy. Do charity work.
- Do a general cleaning regularly and get rid of old, unnecessary things. Mountains of junk weaken your energy.
- Be on the water – the sea, lake, river, or at least stand under the shower. Water is our sexual energy.
- Argue, push, compete, and complain less. Be gentle, soft, and diplomatic, compliment yourself and other women.
- Water the flowers on the windowsill, dig in the garden, and do some handicrafts.
- Say “I can” (this is a male formulation) less often, and “I want” more often. But first, figure out what you want.
- Don’t be afraid to be alone; use this time as an opportunity to take care of yourself and accumulate energy.
Luscher test: How much feminine and masculine energy do you have?
Place these colors in order. The first one is the one you like the most. And then in descending order.
Interpretation of the Luscher test:
In the Luscher test, eight colors can be divided as follows: male active – red and yellow; male active-passive – green, black; female passive – blue, gray, brown, violet. If you prefer the “active” colors – red and yellow – then male energy predominates in you.
Red color symbolizes intense activity, eccentricity, and extroversion.
Yellow – expansion, outward striving, eccentricity, excitement.
Green is associated with will, self-affirmation, and the desire to be significant.
Black is an expression of protest, negativity, and impulsive-aggressive expectation.
Blue color symbolizes the desire for peace, harmony, and sensitivity.
Gray is isolation, restraint, and social isolation.
Brown is the need for rest, suppression, or inhibition of physical needs.
Purple is a desire for passive fantasizing, eroticism, suggestibility, and sensuality.
Free form
For 10-15 minutes, just draw whatever comes to mind.
Interpretation of “free form”:
What is important is not the content of the drawing, but the form of presentation of the material.
If geometric shapes with angles (diamonds, squares, rectangles) predominate, then the masculine principle rules in your character.
If there are a lot of circles, ovals, curved lines, flowers, patterns with smooth lines, then you have more feminine energy.
